What have I done?

I like flowers.

I like nice yards.

I love to take pictures of my pretty flowers.

I like to think that, with enough wishful thinking and occasional effort, I will have a lovely yard. Maybe not all professionally landscaped looking, but nice.

And so, riding high on that dream and an internet discount, I bought some plants.

What was I thinking?!

They arrived today. A box full of tiny little baby plants. Sweet little drooping things too long enclosed in a dark cardboard box. Baby plants that need a carefully prepared bed and some love and attention.

Who did I think was going to provide that for them?

I can't even remember where I had envisioned planting them. I mean, I vaguely remember, but all those areas need to so very much prep. And, of course, I didn't do the prep before the plants arrived. And, of course, all the baby plants arrived at once, on the same day, in the same box, with instructions to plant them all immediately.

In the box are 4 tiny baby lilac bushes. They are so tiny. I'm not sure what I expected from "2 year bare root" plants but they are TINY! The kind of thing you'd mow over without blinking. The kind of thing that will be overwhelmed and lost amongst all my aggressive invasive species. The kind of thing that may not last one summer.

And the three blue hydrangea "bushes" are even smaller than tiny. They came packaged on a microscope slide.

And in addition to the bushes, there's a smattering of blue flowers that supposedly are easy to grow. But all, also, need to be stuck in soft dirt and watered. Requiring effort and attention.

So ...

I'm feeling bad for all the lovely things I'm about to kill.

What have I done?